Through the Looking Glass: A Journey of Dreams, Loss, and Revelation

 Last night I dreamt I took a tour of my life. I walked through relationships and my dog and other pets I have lost came back to me. I sat in a room, doing arts and crafts. I was excited to learn how to create, and out the big window in front of me life played out. When I went and joined, is when the tour came. There was a lot of difficulties and a great deal of overcoming. But, when I returned to my home with the wisdom, and my dog, I felt connected creating. This is a mirror to my life. In these quiet times of creating, understanding will come over me and I see things in a simpler view. The most obvious thing on my mind when I woke was how complicated we have made what is happening right now.

The weakness of humans, the perversion and falling away from the divine has always been what scares me and disgusts me. It has been the things within myself I am ashamed of and bring to the light of understanding and healing. I have "seen" how evil tempts man. They do it through porn, and other things to bait depravity. When the human nature gives in, they record and witness it, then blackmail the individual. What a horrible trap to be in. The fear of things that you hate about yourself coming to light. I know that feeling too. It is better to be honest and free yourself, than to live in constant terror and pay daily for a deed you regret. What happens when we have groups, operations of people set out to do this to other groups or nations? We have what is happening today.

I do always look for the good in people, until they show me the bad and that relationship with evil and destruction is what they want, over good and progression. Yesterday I watched the meeting in the Oval Office. I saw the Spirits of all involved. And while I was angry at the behavior, my heart broke also. My heart hurts for the leaders that have the courage to stand up and attempt to navigate this world. They represent countries filled with people, humans, us. There was despair and fear, anger and agitation. It brought me sorrow to witness the frailty in us all. I then spent time watching "the richest man in the world" talk to a very popular podcaster. I saw that same spirit of creating, wanting to dedicate the energy and mind to building. I see the same thing in Trump. He resonates with me because I see his love for creating also. In Zelensky, I didn't see a man wanting war, I could be wrong. I maybe don't have all the facts. But, what I saw was a conviction for something he was trying to reconcile. 

I spent the afternoon in bed from exhaustion and decided to tune into X and listen to another podcaster talk about the situation. His points seemed so accurate and obvious. It is what many intuitively feel, people are being blackmailed. Countries are being threatened and much evil is continuously evolving from this. We are stumbling with our labels and understating what is happening. We are causing more divisions with people instead of just naming what this is, the evil. Perhaps it is Satan doing what he does best, sow division. This blackmail operation worked so well with our government that they implemented it into our society in a less than secretive way. Through Diddy. How do you get control over groups of wealthy people and control their assets? Blackmail them through human fragility. Prey on dark natures. Indoctrinate cultures into this behavior.

I live in two worlds, one on Facebook and one on X. I am not shocked by the fact that people I love don't want to hear the other side of the story. I grew up with an outside world demonizing me for being a victim. Maybe it is because of all of the things that happened to me severely shifted my perspective. What had my life had been like if I wasn't taught from an early age that this is a mental universe? My esoteric and gnostic roots saved me. I am thinking that is why it was introduced into my life at such a young age. I didn't have religious stumbling blocks that have turned into hurdles for most of the people I encounter. The most scary book I have read was actually the Old Testament. I never liked studying it, it seemed so violent. But, many of my questions came from there too, regarding religion. That research will open your eyes. You can't force anyone to research if they don't want to. That is the pearls to the swine. I get it. I've "gotten it" for years. For a lifetime. The part that doesn't make sense to me is the visions and dreams, why they came true. I began to question if I was manifesting all these things, or if they were prophesy. 

My brain has been fried over the month of February, so much has happened. It has been challenging, on the world's stage and personally. I found myself yesterday, the last day of the month having no energy to tie up the month, put a bow on it and pack it up. I justified I am missing a few days in this month and am allowing myself some space. I wandered onto the interwebs for a mental break. Just a few fun videos, cat videos, you know the CG AI ones where the cat goes to market then cooks his meal. Those entertain me to no end. Another video came in the mix, a lady who was decorating. I loved what she was doing. The colors of the walls, my mind was thrilled. She roamed through her dwelling inspiring with what she had created and a feeling came. I wanted resources. I wanted to see what I could create with greater resources. Then it stuck and the dream came.

Before I did fall asleep, before the concept "stuck" I found myself downstairs, at my desk asking Grok about the markets. Job markets, retail markets, trends ... Then it came over me, that feeling of why I left that world behind. I closed my laptop and went to dreamland. I woke this morning with the question, so how do we fix this? My body ached and felt heavy when I stood up. Oh it hurts to walk. I push through it, like I do with no choice. I have cats to feed, wood to chop, and water to carry. And a premier to go to today. The dress I have been frantically laboring over will finally be worn tonight. I will see myself on a big screen, acting, and I will observe. I will have to prepare myself for that mind fuck once I sit down at the table, wearing the dress that caused the stress of the month of February.