Anger
A few nights ago, I was laying on my side in bed, watching out the window. I was peaceful, yet this anger kept bubbling up. I tried to push it down, and thought why? Because I have been in trouble a lot in my life over my anger. My temper has been a wild fire that takes so much to contain. I hurt people, then feel the deepest of regret and shame. Over the years I have practiced with every opportunity I have received. My brother is diagnosed with an Anger Disorder and has a police record that showcases this longing running family hostility deeply. From the physical violence, mental, emotional and sexual. The violence has been the undertow of danger. If you have ever been caught up in an undertow, you know the helpless fear. Once on the Cossatot River, which is a very difficult river to maneuver, I got pulled under, then trapped under a rock. I fought, I tried to cling to the slippery rock, unable to breathe, heavy currents pounding me back under the rock. I opened my eyes, blurry, to