Through the Fog
Signs, Struggles, and Spiritual Upgrades
It is twenty four degrees f. outside and feels much colder. I have Angel in a casket in my car, I need to drop him off for cremation. I am struggling with doing that. It has to be done. This morning I struggled to get out of bed. I am struggling with chopping wood and carrying water. As I was sweeping the floor, preparing to scoop cat shit up, I had insight. Reminding me the gifts in these moments of chop wood. I remembered the dream I had a decade of ago, of Judgement Day.
Most of all the visual signs I have been given, have come to pass, or are in process. It has made me hyper aware of my feelings, and my response to everything around me. I laid in my office for day with Angel, knowing these were his final days. We laid under the Tree of Baubles I have been creating. I have never been much of a fan of blue for Christmas. But, I am in love with this Bauble Collection I have created. This has brought me the most peace during this time. Outside of this home, attacks are raging across the world, apparently. Our Society has lost all trust in what is being presented in the 3d world. This reality around me, I have turned away from.
I sat at my desk this morning, drinking my coffee, looking at the empty chair where Angel used to sit. Sadness came over me. I feel so exhausted. But it is not in me to give in. I begin questioning myself of my place in this reality. Am I doing my best? Yes, I am currently. I am withstanding this winter storm. We are all safe in our little nook on this surface and I am in much gratitude for that. I looked over at my blue and white tree and a recent dream was triggered. The Ice Mountains I have dreamt of. The world very high that tested my fear of heights. Was this another visual sign? I then remembered the dream of the fog of judgement falling on everyone.
This fog has everybody asking questions. The drones aren't even a topic now. They are moving this reality through fast upgrades. I started recalling questioning fog I had seen before it even became a topic. I think a lot of people were seeing it. I remember standing at the Festival of Lights, looking up to try and see the stars. What was that weird mist in the air? Was it fog? I remember asking a couple of people that. Driving home, on frigid winter nights down winding roads over bridges, I would normally roll through fog. But these were dense pockets, in strange places that it would normally not gather. What is this fog falling over us? Are we merely a scientific experience? I recalled vivid feelings of knowing this was some sort of simulation in those moments.
Sweeping I couldn't let these thoughts go. What could this all mean? I thought about the dream I had a decade ago where the fog and mist of judgement was going to fall upon us all. We all struggled differently moving within the fog. It was very heavy for some, making them unable to walk. There was a loud voice on the stage. Was this the voice of Trump? Yet, another sign pointing to all these dreams coming to pass? Spiritually, I think about the unfurling of this being the shift, the change in guard, an upgrade. A massive update to the Matrix.
I questioned my goal of excellency while cleaning. I am half assing it, and I have Justified and Recognized the reasoning for this. I have excuses. But, I don't want to be a victim of that excuse, because ultimately I am in control here. My mind feels like it is flipping through files, connecting paths, mass dumping memory into folders. Who reveals excellency in this Reality? I question myself of all these things. I wonder if I am crazy, momentarily, and I ask myself the question. I Judge my life around me in this moment. What is it revealing to me?
In my physical surroundings, I have an Angel to drop off for cremation. I have a house that needs to be cleaned. I have emails, texts, appointments - long overdue for being checked. I have the Scream Awards this Saturday, wondering if it will be postponed, due to the Winter Storm. Realistically, nothing can be done outside right now. Nothing needs to be done, except tending to Angel. I am working up the energy to ask Derek to do it. I am emotionally drained. I am physically drained and I need to recuperate. I want to spend time Healing, Creating and Resting. I am not neglecting any urgent duties right in this moment. Nothing that my energy wants to extend to. I need the energy I have to maintain for a moment, nourish myself deeply, replenish myself and work Always toward Excellency.
