The Material

 I have dreams that I know are just my mind running through the days events, and then I have dreams that shake me with knowledge. I haven't been the best at interpreting my dreams, but I know when they are spiritual communications. Last night I dreamt about the dark forces behind the mirage of what we see with our human eyes. It was bizarre, but not surprising. It was intriguing to think about it, even at face value.

I dreamt I was with some friends in a mall area by a pier. This place seems to be the "mall" area of all my dreams. I have had many dreams in this location and it is familiar. There were lots of people and we were roaming through all the shops and eateries. We stumbled upon a couple of particular shops that were amazing to us. For me, the fashion and accessories were beautiful. I had never seen such beautiful things and at a very fair price. I was enamored by the baubles and fabrics. My friends not being as into textiles as me were ready to move on and find an eatery. We left, but not without me purchasing a top I was now wearing. We wandered around and around the mall area until everyone tired. And I wanted to return back to the shop that was my favorite. 

I left my group in search of the shops and could not find them. I was confused, they were right here I thought. I then returned to my friends and asked them to help me find it. Some were too tired, but a couple came with me. They became as perplexed as me. Where were these shops? Around and around we walked, convinced they were right here, but now just a bar. It was very strange to me, and frustrating. I was just missing it somehow. There were now just the two of us, baffled and searching when I spotted another friend coming my way with a message. I ran to her, she was injured. She was a delicate fairy and had been wounded trying to bring me this message. She gave me a map to follow. Off me and my other friend went.

We came to a back alley, hidden away behind the mall. It was gray, sterile and very dark. We checked the map for an entry way, but could only find a small entry into the back of what was a glass elevator. We climbed in and held on tight. It was terrifying for me with my fear of heights, and the metal was making noises. Up and up we went, then side movements, up again, it was strange. We were in the back of this elevator for a bit when we decided we had to take a chance and get off. When glass started breaking beneath and around us, we knew we had to get out immediately. The doors opened and out we scampered, ducking and hiding. 

We were in an office building, filled with what looked like vendor offices. There were so many offices and doors that led into clinical settings, and some into retail rooms. I spotted some of the merchandise from the store I was looking for that vanished. Was this the home office to the store? I was admiring all the textiles when I spotted a woman. We ducked and hid, but she saw us. We told her we were admiring all the goods. She was in the middle of doing a photo shoot of product. She was walking us through how she was going to photograph them. I was intrigued, this wasn't a normal photoshoot. There was something about the product and a finish that was on them that could be manipulated once she captured them with this camera. She was tired and frazzled when her boss noticed us. Fear came over her and she didn't look at her boss. In that moment I was very aware she was a human, her boss was not. 

All these beings sat at a table, in a meeting. Her boss looking at me with disgust. If she wasn't in a meeting she would rip me to pieces. What I felt in that moment terrified me. I knew I shouldn't be there. I became aware in that moment that what I was seeing outside this building was not real. That shop that vanished, was not real. It was an illusion they could pick and move around. I was trying to wrap my mind around it. All this information came flooding in as I stood in fear looking at the boss woman. What was she? Maybe she could pass as a human, but I knew it wasn't. 

The row of "people" conducting this meeting were starting to stir at the table and panic came over me. I ran and hid. My friend and I then thanked the lady taking the photoshoot for her knowledge, but she pretended not to see us. She knew her boss was watching. We took off towards the elevators and rode one down. It moved quick. Once on the street level, we tried to find our way out. I kept looking for markers to remember the building. What was the address? Could I find it again. As we were leaving the building I saw a giant "W" and some other letters and numbers. Did it say WEIN? Was that a 3? What was this? In my mind I started putting together words or names for Wein. Weinstein? Was that the name of the building? 

Out onto the street we were safe and felt we had to get away from the building. We navigated back to the mall area where once again I couldn't find the shops. We walked around and all I kept thinking was if any of this were even real? Why would certain shops phase in and out of my reality? Why such attention on retail and consumerism? It felt like a mirage catered for consumption. I looked around at the people at the bars and tables, consuming. Everyone seemed so happy. Was this the matrix? I woke up perplexed. 

The theme of the dream seemed pretty clear. We are living in an illusion manufactured by some sort of optical illusions. We are engaged with the optics in exchange for energy. We are selling our attention to products. To get the most energy, the illusion is catered to the individual. These optics are managed by a company that did not appear to be human. They worked in an obscure building hidden from the people. This seems bizarre on the surface, but intuitively, it doesn't seem so crazy to me.  The lingering fear when I woke up was that the boss lady saw me. But, at the same time, she gave me info through her gaze. She wanted me to be aware, but still fearful. I didn't want to be taken in by my wonderment of technology. The woman working there seemed frazzled. What of all these "material goods" though? 

My struggle between the material and spiritual is very real to me. It always has been. My love for creating with material items keeps me in the material. Or, maybe it is because that is one of the most enjoyable indulgences I have in the material. I love the creative manipulation of the material realm. We create so many things in the material. My mind races this morning trying to dissect the material while inhabiting it. I have two doctor appointments today. Appointments to help me navigate in the material. They have constructs attached to them, such as time frames. Moving forward is the clock, reminding me of what time it is, like a construct over experience. It doesn't feel natural or innate to have this oppressive clock hanging over my morning, day or experience.