Waves

 Last's night vivid dream I originally attributed to listen to Ben Davidson's Live Q & A. The magnetic pole reversal is speeding up. I have been listening to Suspicious 0bserver for a long while. At least a decade, every morning. It is my news. Like many others, this "inner knowing" has been plaguing an entire life. And we tune into others that are more observant in these areas, and suspicious. But, then I remembered, these dreams started long before I started researching what all this could mean to me, and life on Earth. It has been reoccurring. 

I dreamt I was running for shelter as many of these particular dreams start. It has been in different eras, but I know what it is. It is a disaster of some sort. I started recounting in my head; one in a high jungle, one that was very military, one that had aliens, many  more scenarios. This was a mesh of modern day and other "timelines" meshing. I was running through a modern city, but the feel was the eighties. I ran with sorrow and anger of abandonment. I ran to store after store, seeking shelter. I was refused. What is so wrong with me in all these scenarios? I am always left seeking shelter on my own, being very cunning and camouflaging myself for safety. Trying to blend in, until I find others. 

These are considered part of my PTSD brought on by a very chaotic childhood that it took decades to recover from. Kind of like we are all feeling right now. It feels like we are waking up from the amnesia, quick enough to realize we are about to get walloped again, so we duck. It is chaos, find shelter to get stable. 

Last night it was a shopping mall of all places. And I was somehow on the wrong side of fashion. I feel like this might be a first. The feelings of rejection are still there. However, I am young and cunning in this dream. Far more resourceful and quick. It's almost as if I am watching the characters play different end of world scenarios. Very much along the 3 Body Problem Netflix show that I recently binged and has become very popular. It's a gathering. Heads up!

I find my way to the tallest of buildings and find myself along the center wall. I am looking for small inner spaces to hide, but the shaking begins. It was like a dog shaking water, we all came flying out of our spaces. We began to unite, and seek a larger space to hide. We are gathering with details when we hear others coming. I crawl into a space, trying to "appear like the others" but, he notices. He is in a light gray suit. This is a fashion dream I remind myself as I am pouring over the seams. The cut is perfect. This suit is tailored to perfection. Not a gray hair out of place. His face glitches. He reaches toward me. He knows. 

We are all standing in a room now with windows. I am looking at only minor destruction so far. Could this be it? I remembered getting this far before. Then a meshing of other dreams. Jungle houses, glass skyscrapers, shelter walls. There is a pounding, a shaking. I stood in the room, turned around and screamed "That is the sound of waves!" At first, I thought the lapping was a good sign. In fear of seeing the wall of water, I woke up. Another night terror in the books. Even as I type this, I feel my anxiety in my chest rising. I needed to ground. Where was my checklist?

After listening to Ben (and I feel like looking at him every morning for over a decade, I can call him that) I started thinking about the magnetic affects again. And something Ben said deeply resonated with me, "Pour ALL your love into him." I thought, once again, someone outside of me is validating my thoughts and conclusions. I was trying to backtrack the process of how I started connecting some dots regarding all this. It is kind of like when I am playing Diablo, and I actually get a moment to check out all my gear. Buy some potions and see the healer. Maybe even check my wardrobe.