Mirror, Mirror

 In my immediate space this morning I asked myself, what do you see? Without any external input, what is in your reality right now? I ran down my checklist and I thought about this journey. The irony of building a perceived wall around myself, being the very thing that is freeing me. The things that need my immediate attention is my health. The thing I think I am working on, yet keep allowing toxicity in. 

I took positive action this week on not responding to anything that felt as if it were going to cost me more than I would gain from an energy source. That including not responding or engaging to any calls. The phone is an energy drain for me. Knowing I have to call around for a dentist is already irritating me. Not engaging however has allowed me to be more creative again, which feels nice. I'm excited for the observance of the upcoming experiences. Preparing for this character I am portraying has created a deeper portal of thought about myself.

I have been working on creative projects and listening to various podcasts and you-tubers. Dr. Ramani has just described every feeling I have with her telling of the truth teller in the family. I recently refused to answer the phone or return calls. The feelings of disgust had become to much to even want to think about participating in. I don't have the energy or the space for abuse. I am already wrestling with this inner anger that I have continued to participate out of guilt. I'm not the one who should feel guilt. Let that reflect on you, which leads me to my thoughts about my new character. I'm on the other side of the mirror now. What I am reflecting to you is your responsibility. 

While thinking and listening this week to Dr. Ramani, I felt so painfully all of what she was describing. It does help me to know that there are people trying to bring this type of treatment from the general populace isn't acceptable. Paradigms are shifting, truth tellers are being seen. History is a perspective to participate in. We can't believe anything that isn't in some sort of agreement with ourself. That is what it means to be true to myself. And knowing myself enough to discern what I am truly in agreement with. I am someone who has persevered persecution, been resilient and have fought desperately to temper my rage with grace. I am ecstatic about being on the other side of the mirror.