Round 2: Day 1
I've arrived at the time I set forth to dedicate to myself and my healing. July and August, 8 weeks of working completely on myself. I am integrating Nancy Levin's "The Art of Change" once again as a guiding structure. Today I revisited my vision from last year to compare it to my vision this year. The question was:
In six months, what do you envision your health to be? In six months I envision optimal health, maintaining understanding that I need to work on this meat sack, but I am not, this meat sack. But, truly, what is health to me? How do I define Health? My wellbeing. My BEING WELL. So, what of this being?
Reflection. I can see my reality reversed to me in a mirror. I can observe that what I am viewing through this mirror is a reflection what I see that defines my reality. The person I see reflected back to me, is my physical body. It is how I move around on this planet.
Directly reflected back at me are insecurities that come from programming I have allowed. You're aging, your skin is sagging, you are old. Next comes the barrage of attacks on myself over my weight and build. Follows this is the frustration I have over covering the meat sack.
Beyond that, I want to move with ease, breathe with ease and think with ease. My optimal health isn't a goal post, it is a daily engagement into my reality. It is about living in the moment fully, consciously with this intent of immersion. To fully experience and evolve.
Health is intertwined with nourishment. I equate functioning well with the term healthy. What does healthy mean for me? My physical body to be able to enable me to have the experiences I desire here. Before I get lost on a tangent of desires, I want to bring it in closer and say, I want to move around with ease. I want to challenge my physical body to begin to heal. My mental state is next. First and foremost, my internal war on drugs and the DIAGNOSIS of my mental state. I am currently using natural drugs and prescribed drugs. I have oversight on all prescribed drugs and at this moment am in trust. I am my own oversight on natural drugs, as well as what is legally allowed to me, my allotment. I have kept journals for three years, recording my mixtures and usage. I have always stayed below my allotted amount, and have discerned for myself where I begin to not function well.
The body emotional connection. I am currently using an estrogen patch twice weekly. Today is actually the day to change my patch. This will be the second one in total. I did discontinue my ADHD med for two days as I noticed my blood pressure was increasing and I was not getting sleep. I reduced my sleeping med to half a dose out of necessity last night, I have run out, forgetting to call it in. I slept well. I rested most of the last couple of days.
Regarding my health, I want to work on having a high vibrational diet. For me, this truly interacting with my nourishment. Communing with sustenance. Becoming very aware of what I am putting into body, my mobile. This will require a shift in my diet from dead processed foods to living foods. This is where my conscious effort has to come forth. With my choice to choose what I will prepare for our household body. Next, my spiritual health.
My spiritual self is connected with my mental and physical. It is also intertwined with my creativity. In these moments I take full control of my creation. I create. I am In-Spirit.
