Mapping

 I made it to Act 4 in Diablo 4, to get a horse. Riding through areas on the map is so much easier on a horse. It is important for me to map. I realized this in the game, and this morning while trying to create a schedule. I've come to this place so many times, kind of like that one large boss in a dungeon. This time I am going to drink this potion, equip this amulet, enchant this weapon... I instantly saw the parallels in my own life. Maybe that is why I love this game so much. This morning I set out to create once again, a schedule. As I am to see my medicine man, which is a reminder for me to evaluate my progress. Have I leveled up? Are the potions working? How's your armor? My self evaluation begins. What's my marker and where's my map?

I pulled out various pieces of paper and started charting. What would my daily adventures look like? Whether it is a ship, a spacecraft, a rogue on a horse, or a woman sitting in her space she created, dreaming. This inspired me to dream in a multi-universe. I pull every thought back into the space I am in now. My apartment I have spent many years in. Do I feel safe? In comparison to all aspects of my life? Yes. In my space, I feel safe. My fear is beyond what I have mapped, a world in complete turmoil that I have no control over. Like the demons I travel the roads to slay, one area at a time, one stronghold at a time, one boss at a time. So who are my bosses? What are my bosses? Back to the map, I center myself. I debate with myself over this unfinished quest, this schedule. Why is this needed? Because this is what I need to be my most optimal self. I asked myself what I needed to feel my absolute best and most productive self. Back to the mapping.

Optimal is the reward I gain from the boss that betters my quests. Every time I set out to study what is Optimal, and how do I obtain it, CHAOS! My brain starts just shooting arrows everywhere. Steady yourself. What is making you trigger happy? What is the anxiety lurking in the shadows of the trees? Is it my internal conflicts regarding control over my time here? Is it because I feel like I have lost so much? There is a huge weathered bag here to unpack, it's too heavy to carry. I'm not in an optimal state to carry all this and must take inventory. I start with myself. In this moment, in this space, what do you absolutely feel you need? To organize this bag, take off this armor, check my wounds, mark my map, have some more coffee infused with my potion of Lilac Diesel.